Middle-aged mom is looking for a local 20-something girl to spoil.
The lucky applicant will have access to daily doses of k cups, free internet access, and leftovers in ready-to-go Tupperware containers. Said applicant must be willing to call me (or at least text me) a minimum of once a day. Perks include the ability to call me at work anytime to ask for help with such emergencies as “Mom, I just got the worst haircut!”
Additional highlights of this position? Feel free to enter my house anytime of day OR night to use my washer and dryer, take frozen Wegman’s pizzas from my fridge, ‘borrow’ small appliances, and money.
Male applicants need not apply. I don’t know how to raise them and they don’t come with clear instructions.
Yes, today is the day my youngest daughter moves out of town (she will no longer be just a mile down the road). There is an immediate need to fill this position; I am about to go buy an entire bouquet of cats for myself.